During the past few days, I've been thinking quite often... Labels: apology, thoughts and etc.
Issue #1 :
I've been wondering about how every choice we make will eventually affect others. And I've finally come to a conclusion that any choices in life that we make has a definate effect on others, no matter the magnitude of effect. Doesn't this create a web-like effect amongst us humans? Its so interesting to ponder over this concept. Hmm.
Issue #2 :
Often you'll hear, "Go to hell!" or "You'll go to hell after you die, sinner!"
I've also been wondering about the context in which "hell" is used. In my opinion, its more of a "symbol" rather than a "literal" concept. I mean, isn't "hell" something associated with sins and misbehaviour of sorts? That's the reason why I'm starting to think that the concept of "hell" was made up people of ancient times to deter the future generations of people from "sinning". Therefore, when people say things like "You're going to hell for your sins", I feel that maybe they believe the concept of hell to be "literal" as in a horrid place to be after death... Interesting huh?
Moving on from the heavy thinking issues, the recent few days have been fairly enjoyable if not, very enjoyable with visiting relatives and stuff. But the guilt within me keeps me awake at night and pricks at me even during the daytime. The source of this guilt? Its because of the issue from the previous post. With the passing of everyday, I feel even worse for making her angry and irritated.. And even more guilty for my actions..
All I can say now is :
I'm sorry.
Yup, I think I just pissed off someone accidentally. Honestly, I didn't even have that intent to hurt that person's feelings. It was just for the fun of it and I thought that we could just turn it into something funny but somehow, SOMEHOW, it backfired. How wonderful, right?
I guess I just learnt another lesson in life. That being, to always measure the extent of hurtfulness in what i'm going to do to other before actualizing it.
To the person involved, I extend my sincerest apologies to you.
Anyway, to everyone who happens to read my blog, happy lunar new year in advance! :)
There was a boy
Whom was often seen
Wandering out alone
Into the winter's harsh chill
Where snow blanketed the ground
And winds galed mercilessly
None could understand
His loneliness within
None would understand
His feelings within
His hands, frostbitten
His teeth, chattering
His body, shivering
His eyes, lifeless
His heart, was empty
With a final breath
He closed his eyes
As the winds carried him down
Down the icy precipice...
The pure white snow
Mingled with blood
As the boy lay broken
Yet with a smile on his frozen face
For he knew,
He was home.
Haha, finally i've got the time to post. Anyway, the last few days have been rather busy with the JAE thingy, badminton and reading up on Java. The book about Java is rather noob-friendly as it contains more English then Programmish, which is a great deal for noobs like me. =P
Nothing much to update about... Guess I'll just end it here. =X
Byebye.
Bloodshot skies filled my vision Labels: hestitation
As I stood watching the sunset
Feeling the warmth of the waning sun
And the sorrowful pang of loneliness
Once, you'd stand by me
Comforting me in the darkest hours
Where I stood tormented
By nightmares of every kind
Just when I'd give up
You'll be there, just like
A beacon of light, to guide me
Through the twilight zone
But now, as we drift apart
I no longer find you standing by me
An emptiness lies within me
Eating away at me, tormenting me
Now, in my desolate moments
I can only cower haplessly
As demons, nightmares, tear me apart
Twilight has since descended
As I walk down that tenebrous path
Of uncertainties and doubts,
Which I walked through countless times
I've suddenly notice, today
Only one shadow's left
No longer the usual two.
Oh how I wish I've told you
But alas, I wasn't sure
The defination of which wasn't clear
Afraid of rejection, I couldn't say it to you
Even now, I'm still undecided
Sitting alone in this dark room
Writing down this poem.
Disappointed with my results.
Here they are anyway.
English - A2
Mathematics - A1
Additional Mathematics - A2
Geography - A2
Combined Humanities - A2
Physics - A2
Chemistry - B3
Higher Chinese - D7
That's about it.
*sigh*
Life is a wonder
So fleeting, yet ancient
A curiousity to ponder
Everlasting yet transient
Life, so promising
Of happiness and hope
Yet, sometimes discouraging
With hurdles, we cannot cope
Life, just like a river
Ever-flowing, always going
Yet sometimes, like a river
Subject to nature, catastrophies do occur
Life, could be said
To be just a dream
Yet, never are we alone
For it is a common dream
That's right, those were the highlights of my day today. Labels: another day
Went to AMK's cinema to watch "Red Cliff 2" at 1:30pm. In my opinion, after watching the movie, it was a movie that made me feel that the $6 were well-spent. The entire atmosphere throughout the length of the movie engaged me within and the story was also fascinating, even though I read about it in the book already. Haha, therefore, I recommend this movie to those who haven't watched it yet, especially those who watched the first one already.
Then immediately after the movie trip, I went to chinatown to meet up with my sister, her bf and my mother. T'was a rather enjoyable trip, except that I wasn't in the mood for CNY because of what's happening on 12th Jan.. Haiz...
And... it's the end of another day.. That's it for now.
Earth; darkness claimed Labels: Night; Loneliness
Why; For night came
Silence desended upon the land;
Gradually but certainly
Another day had met its end;
Quickly. but sadly
Loneliness besieged me;
But I did not worry
For I knew for certain
If I drew the curtain;
The moon would be shining;
So distant yet so bright
Stars will be twinkling;
Little sparkles in the night
My everlasting companions in the night;
Accompanying me as I bid the Earth goodnight.
The title says it all. Wait... isn't 12th January like.. 3 days away? 3 DAYS AWAY?! Crap. Now my nerves are all acting up again.. Just like I was telling YL and JH, at 2 pm on Monday there will only be 2 possible expressions: ='( / xD. I really hope it'll be "xD" for us all.. Haiz.. Labels: Nerves
Anyway, played 6 rounds of WC3:FT with Yl today and the score was:
The Alliance of Yl and Me - 3
Imba AI - 3
Haha, t'was fun but I kept dozing off halfway during the last game.
Oh, and I finally got my Physics TYS back from my primary school friend today.. Met him at Hougang Mall's Mac Donald's and chatted awhile before he had to leave for his job.. Picked up a breakfast set from Mac Donald's since it was so "shun lu". Haha..
That pretty much sums up my day..
...boy, am i ever feeling nervous right now...
A quiz gotten from Jiahui's blog which is gotten from somewhere else:
1. How old will you turn in 2009?
17.
2. Would you rather love one person or have many relationships?
Love one person.
3. Would you date someone 8 years older than you?
Highly Unlikely.
4. When was the last time you laughed?
Yesterday.
5. What were you doing at 4am this morning?
Hibernating.
6. What's your relationship with the person you last texted?
Friend.
7. What did you do today?
Its a secret.
8. Who do you really want to see now?
Hmmm, no one in particular.
9. Will your next kiss be a mistake?
No idea. I haven't even had my first kiss!
10. Who's your last missed call?
Mom's office
11. What's something you really want now?
To get good results.
12. What was your first thought when you woke up this morning?
"Crap, one day closer to receiving results"
13. Would you go back in time if you had the chance?
Definately, I would love the chance to correct my past wrongs.
14. What's something you need to go shopping for?
Food.
15. Do you want kids?
You could say so.
16. Are you in love with anyone?
How do you define love? I do feel affection for someone but is it love...? I'm not sure.
17. How's your heart lately?
Doing well! Thanks for asking.
18. When was the last time you slept on the floor?
I forgot. =X
19. Is your phone close to you?
Handphone - 15 cm in front of me.
HomePhone - In the room beside mine.
20. What is bothering you now?
Many things. For example, what to eat tomorrow for lunch.
21. What does your last received text message say?
A long one. "Oh yeah, i bet yl misses me. Just joking! Anyways, been rather busy cause i'm working my heads off, but i suppose i could play dota with you guys next week :D
22. Where are you now?
My room! ^^
23. Are you listening to music?
Yep!
24. Do you like country music?
Some of it.
25. Do you wet toothbrush before toothpaste?
Yes.
26. How is your hairstyle right now?
Messy!
27. Do you like your first name?
=)
28. The last thing you drank?
Plain water.
29. What you sing obnoxiously in the car?
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves and this it how it goes... I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves and this it how it goes... I know a song... so on and so forth.
30. What did you do 15 minutes ago?
I believe I was at question... 5?
31. Do you think you are a good person?
So-so.
32. The first contact in your phone?
Adaptor
33. The sweetest person in your life?
No idea..
34. The closest male to you now?
My shadow.
35. The person you're chatting with now?
Jia Hui.
36. The languages you are able to speak?
English, Chinese, Teochew (a little), Hokkien(a little), Malay(very limited vocabulary) and Cat language.
37. The last person whom you screwed?
No one!
38. One word about your life now.
Worrying.
39. Where do you wish to work?
In front of the computer!
40. what are you specially good at?
DOTA.
41. Would you date someone younger than you?
Depends.
42. Who are you to yourself?
My bestest friend.
43. Do you forgive people easily?
Depends on situation.
44. Which girl is precious to you now?
Secret.
45. Your dressing style?
Polo-T and 3/4 pants.
46. How are you different from other girls?
I'm a dood.
47. The bad point in yourself?
Many things.
48. The last contact in your phone?
Zoe
49. Your favourite song?
Lost paintings.
50. The 2 hated contacts in your phone?
Why would you hate someone and still keep their numbers? To send hate messages?
51. Learn one language in 10 days?
Learn without ever applying!
52. One gorgeous girl you came across?
=X
53. Who's your biggest enemy?
No enemies to speak off.
54. Which gang do you support?
Hou - gang. See what I did there?! ^^
55. What do you think about gangsters?
False bravado.
56. Proper age to join gang?
Never.
57. Do you have a blogspot?
I wonder.
58. Do you like people who smoke?
Nope.
59. What do you think about modelling?
Nothing much.
60. Given a chance, would you like to be a model?
No.
61. Whose approval to you usually seek first?
Myself.
62. What do you wish to be in the future?
A programmer.
My own question!
63. What is a man?
A miserable pile of secrets!
As you can see from the title, today was indeed a rather uneventful day. Went over to YL's place to slack around in the morning and left at around 2. Haha, then I paid the library a visit to dump in the books i borrowed before and went in to check out some stuff. After reaching home, I suddenly felt inspired to clean the staircase, and I did just that! Following that was dinner, and afterwhich were the usual dota matches.. Labels: boring day
Thanks for the Day :
JiaHui, for volunteering to wake me up at 8 today.
Lyl, for the piano score
All in all, it was a boring day.
Ahh, such is the fate of mortals.
Haha, the title says it all! Labels: first post
Well, this blog actually isn't set up for me to blog in my daily life but to instead let me test some html thingies. But since it's started, I might as well update it right?
:)
Anyway, the impending release of the O' levels results has been giving me many nightmares/dreams (which is rather rare, for me to have dreams). Even though everyone says no point worrying, I can't help it! Oh well, just have to anxiously wait for the day of the release to come...
Have a good day all!
P.S: Happy New Year (Belated)
Name:Nicholas
Birthday:2 November
Nicks:Niggles/Chocho/Snowball
School:Montfort Primary, Anderson Secondary, Nanyang Junior College
Contact:;D
[[Likes]]
Food:Almost everything
Drinks:Green Tea, Milk Tea, Coffe
Colour:Green and Red
Past-times:Reading,Playing%Sleeping
[[Detests]]
People:I don't detest people
Things:Can't reveal this.
Food:Can't reveal this too.
[[Music's Playing]]
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